This is hard for me to write but after the death of a family member I’ve decided it's something I need to think hard about. Mental health affects us all in different ways and its not something that we always talk about. It’s so easy to say you’re just going through a rough time or having a bad day. It can be difficult asking for help but it can be even harder admitting you have a problem.

I’ve suffered from depression probably my whole life. Sure, I had a turbulent childhood changing schools, moving countries, constantly making new friends.  But I never had anything truly bad happen to me. My parents have always been loving, supportive and as I’ve grown older they have become my friends and allies. So what do I have to complain about really? Well, that’s where depression can get a little tricky. It can happen to anyone and even those that may appear to be “happy” on the outside may be struggling on the inside.

There are days, bad ones, where I can’t even imagine myself getting out of bed. The simplest things like getting dressed are the equivalent to running a marathon – exhausting. But I somehow manage to do it and get through the day, hoping that the next day will prove to be easier. For me there are certain things I can do to help with my moods, such as talking to my Mom or exercising with my favorite Burlesque Star/trainer. It’s important to have role models in life, especially if they aren’t perfect themselves (because no one is perfect). I think to myself, “if they can do it I can try too.”

Some of the most important things I’ve learned while dealing with this dark cloud of mine is that I can always ask for help even though it feels like the most difficult and embarrassing thing in the world. It’s more than just acceptance it’s calling the monster out of the darkness. And I’ve had some mixed reactions from friends telling me, “there’s no way you’re depressed!” or “what do you have to be so sad about?” but the explanation isn’t as straight forward as they might think. I still don’t understand it myself, but I’m trying. And I’m trying to get help and not feel so debilitated.

Christmas-time can be a hard time for a lot of people and especially those dealing with mental health issues. I don’t have any wise words or secret remedies but I do believe in the power of talking. Not everyone will understand, care or even know what the hell to do for you. But if you can start a conversation I think that’s the first step.  So whether you need someone to talk to or notice that your friend or family member seems a little “off” take the moment and start talking. Even if you don’t know what to say. Tell them you’ll listen.